Seeking feedback on the link to

The ApologyPlus idea originated in December 2004 once I had reflected on The website is a gallery of thousands of people who have each photographed themselves with a self-written “sorry message”; the apology being one made to the world by American citizens for the November 2004 ‘offence’ of their country having re-elected the President who had taken them into war. I guess that achieved wide circulation because it was perceived by recipients as containing a poignant combination of heart, humour and all the humanity of hurt and regret in it. I was inspired to re-connect with what apology means to me and what potential it has for change, personal and public. Whereas has messages giving apologies –on behalf of others!- around one theme, I wondered if one virtual location could be created as a place where apologies were both given and received, in relation to events national, local and inter-personal.

I’m really glad to see that has now led to a site called Whilst the apologies are often not given or received in ways that I would value personally, there is a strong sense that the website(s) have provided a valued and original means of empowerment, giving voice, creating community and connection between people who may never meet yet share the same world regrets.
Please add your comments below on how you respond to the content of What you say and do next can help the development of ApologyPlus and will inevitably change your world!

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Seeking feedback on the links to Marshall Rosenberg

On the right of the most recent web log entry are links to web sites that have stimulated the development of the ApologyPlus idea.
Please add your comments below on how you respond to the content of the links that lead you to the work of Marshall Rosenberg.


£50,000 bid to the ICT Hub –and how ApologyPlus will help individuals and organisations

Mediation UK today submitted a £50,000 funding bid to the “Information and Communication Technology Hub Unmet Need Fund” (part of the ‘ChangeUp’ fund for restructuring the voluntary and community sector.)

In Mediation UK's funding application it was explained that
ApologyPlus will be:
-a network of individuals and organisations helping with difficult communication at no cost to individual service users.
On line we will provide opportunity to;
- explore what you are needing
- make requests
- be heard
- reach agreements about changed behaviour
- learn and deliver mediation processes.”

The ApologyPlus project delivers:
-strategic information and communication technology innovation to mediation services and the wider voluntary sector
-an increased choice of cases for the local mediation services to choose to prioritise and which otherwise might stay hidden
-a means of access to cases (funded or pro bono) for the spare capacity out of the 2500 trained volunteer mediators and a comparable (or greater?) number of individuals trained in Nonviolent Communication.
-a cumulative database built through users’ web-clicks of their needs and strategies to get their needs met
-a healthy mediation sector and wider voluntary sector dialogue about what parts of the work can and can’t be delivered with innovative ICT.


Apology Workshop at forthcoming Mediation UK Conference

Culturally Enabling Apology-Mediation
Apologies developed as an alternative to duels, enabling the saving of face without risking lives. Mediating apologies is a difficult journey through regret, empathy, responsibility, repair and change. Emotional danger lies in the dynamics of one party feeling guilty and accepting negative self-images. Legal danger lies where taking responsibility is not separated from taking legal liability, a necessary distinction for a culture of openness to replace a blame culture. This workshop will explore how the mediator meets and engages with oppressive blame-shame cultures to transform the communication so that each party is able to acknowledge the other’s needs. Sharpen your skills in assisting parties in healthier forms of expressing regret.
For more information about the conference, click here.


ApologyPlus to be launched on 21st May 2006

The ApologyPlus project which Mediation UK is developing seeks to encourage people wanting apologies etc to refer themselves to local mediation services or to access mediators and Nonviolent Communication practitioners by e-mail and phone. Individuals accessing an 'empathy on-line service' may progress to assisted communication of both people's underlying needs. Prior to further development of Mediation UK's website, there will be a brief opportunity to explore with Marshall Rosenberg his experience of helpful and harmful on-line communications and to register your interest in developing this project.
(A leaflet advertising the Marshall Rosenberg day -'Getting to the heart in resolving conflict' can be found at and at
Other matters relating to the 21st May event are posted at